Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Just Some Thoughts and Stuff

I've been quite lax in my blogging of late.  To put it mildly, life has been kicking my ass.  I'm not normally one to just throw my arms up and quit.  I'm a fighter.  I'm also stubborn.  But, lately, I've definitely been wanting to give up and let someone else take over.  *Insert corny Jesus take the Wheel reference*  I'd be quite content with reverting and living my second childhood.  Coloring and naps sound effing awesome!  Someone else can play house, pay the bills, do all the mommy stuff, and worry about all the stuff that needs to be worried about.  I'm not so sure I want to do it, anymore.

Some days I don't feel remotely in charge of my life.  Seriously.  No matter how hard I try, no matter how much I work something, fight tooth and nail for something, it usually doesn't go my way.  Now, I'm one of those nuts that likes to find something good in everything.  If you're going to have something shitty happen to you, wouldn't you rather there be some kind of silver lining that makes it kind of a little less shitty????  Like, when I come out of the store and find my tire flat.  After shouting a few choice expletives and finding a too kind gentleman to help me change it, I could get all pissy and say woe is me.  Actually, that pretty much sounds exactly like what I'd do.  BUT!  After I do all that, I'd sit back and reflect until I can find one good thing about the situation.  Like, it sucks that I had a flat and got to splurge for a new tire that I didn't really have the money for, but at least it didn't blow out while I was speeding down the interstate and kill me instantly.  See what I did there?  Much better, right????

Normally I'm all over the silver lining.  However, there are just some instances in life for which a silver lining just doesn't exist.  I like a good paradox as much as the next guy, but this is fast getting old.  Life has been kicking my ass and even I can't find just cause for it or even some stupid, shitty silver lining.

So, what now????

How do you get through the terrible parts of life and not completely lose your shit or go off the deep end???  Are there some things for which you can't deal with gracefully and therefore it's perfectly acceptable to ugly cry and scream about how unfair life is and break basketball trophies (if you get that reference then I love you and you're awesome), while eating ice cream by the gallon???  How do you get through life's truly ugly and unbearable moments???

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